Professor and Mom

My name is Liz (“Hello Liz!”), and I am a helicopter parent.

Not really. I’m the mother of two loved and fussed-over children, and I’m also a professor at a state university in California. Which is not an easy thing to be right now, what with the California budget crisis and furloughs. All of us—faculty, staff, and students—are feeling put–upon, over-worked, and stressed. And now my little girl has decided to join our community as a college freshman.

Molly described her college application process quite accurately in her first blog post. She didn’t even send me her application essays to proofread. Because she wrote them at the last minute. Because she had a super important party to attend.

I had always hoped that my children would attend the same private liberal arts college that changed my eighteen-year-old life. I remained sanguine as Molly showed no signs of enjoying the math and science in which both her father and I have made our careers. I was even able to be supportive as her grades plummeted in direct, negative correlation with her increasing interest in boys. But when she was rejected from my alma mater, even though I had known all along that it was unlikely that she would be accepted, I cried.

My husband said “Isn’t it wonderful that she will be walking her own path, instead of following yours?” It took me a while to stop hating him for saying that.

I am honestly a little disappointed that Molly decided not to attend SFSU. She is right that we love the idea of her being closer to home and Cal Poly is a “better” school than SFSU. But I’m not sure it’s better for her, personally or professionally. And I was looking forward to having a place to crash in San Francisco.

We have decided to chronicle her first year in college, with regular postings from her as things happen and then my response as both a professor and a mother. I think it will help me see how the university looks from a young person’s perspective, which has become increasingly difficult to do over time. I hope it will also help her see things from her professors’ point of view—and that will help her have a successful and enjoyable time in college.  Which is all that most parents, helicopter or no, want for their child.